I've been eating nothing but salads this week for dinner. I'm actually alright with that.

I go to my local Giant every night on my way home and make myself a little salad from the salad bar. I start with a bed of Romaine lettuce. Top it with a pile of shredded carrots. Then top the carrots with some shredded cheese. Very colorful in its simplicity. I swing around to the other side of the bar and grab some Fajita chicken strips. Maybe a pinch of real bacon bits for garnish and color. Top it all off with a light splash of Thousand Island dressing and, voila! We have salad.

Once my salad is made, I go over to the beverage aisle and pick up a bottled water or a tea or something like. That. Not because it's any healthier than anything else. Just because I like it. Now that I've got dinner and a beverage, I'm out.

This has been perfect for me. Not only is it better for me than the shit that I usually end up eating for dinner, but it's very cheap (only like $3-4), and it's surprisingly enough food to satisfy me up and keep me filled. The chicken is enough protein to keep my carnivorous bloodlust at bay. The lettuce and carrots are just enough filler to keep me full and not attempt to go out and find dinner #2 like a damn Hobbit. (I know, LOTR reference. I don't even like those movies. Shoot me now). There are enough components in my salad that I like that outweigh my argument for not eating salad in the first place; which is there are too many things I don't like.

I usually don't eat salads because of the three primary ingredients, lettuce, tomato, and onion, I despise two of them and merely tolerate the third. I can't stand a raw tomato. Not on anything. Not ever. No hoagies, not zeps, no salads, no nothing. If they're there, I pick them out or off. It's something about the consistency of a cold squishy tomato. I don't like that slimy, pulpy feeling. They even taste different than a cooked tomato. Now a cooked tomato. I'll eat a cooked tomato in nearly anything. Tomato soup (my favorite meal), Tomato sauce, Tomato paste, Salsa (Yes, with the exception of Pico De Gallo, salsa uses cooked tomatoes), Chili (stewed tomatoes), Pizza sauce, etc. Nearly anything. I even put diced tomatoes into most of my own culinary delights. I feel the same way about onions. Raw: eccchh!!! I can stand that acidic, acerbic crunch. God they taste just as bad as they smell. P-U! But a cooked onion. Especially sauteed. A little caramelized. Ooh, baby. I could eat them bitches by themselves. Some dishes I make, like a good steak for example, start with some frozen onions that I sautee in butter with some button mushrooms. Oh, god I just want to eat that part before the steak is even done.

Anyway...

You might be asking yourself why I've been eating like this. A couple of reasons, actually. First, the 15 pounds I lost in the last month, I found them. They were orbiting my ass. So that was a big shock to my system. Plus I've seen the pattern of what, or more importantly how much, I've been eating and it's not good. I've also gotten lazy about lifting in the morning, and noticed that my arms have turned into jelly. So I'm trying to eat better this week because I know I'm going to eat like shit (or at least drink like a fish) both Thursday and Friday of this week. I'm trying to preemptively counter-balance that. I've also gotten back on the stick with lifting in the mornings now. Plus, even though I'm not doing a weight-loss bet with a coworker like we planned, then cancelled, I'm still tryin to lose as if we were. So I figure, let's keep it pushin'. After all, that was my motto for the New Year.

The salads are ok with me. I could probably still eat them for another good while. They're tasty enough not to bore me for a little bit. In a week, who knows? It's just funny. Me eating salad with no prompting. This from they guy who cosigned on, "Why ruin a perfectly good barbecue with salad?" The guy who usually says, "Skip the rabbit food." Who'd a thunk it? My mother thinks there's something going on, like I found a new woman and I'm trying to slim down for her. That's just how she thinks. I should be so lucky. :)

Labels: Fitness, Food, Health

Have you seen the commercials for Nutrisystem with Jillian Barberie?

They say she lost 41 pounds. Did you hear me, butterfly? 41 pounds!!! When was she EVER that big? Don't you think we would have noticed that shit (and complained about it) by now? As much as she's on TV? Come on.

Did you see that photoshopped-ass before picture? There's no frikkin' way She could have snuck and got that big. Who are you trying to bullshit? Maybe you lost 41 pounds in your tits!


Even better is the one with Larry The Cable Guy. "I lost 50 pounds with Nutrisystem" I got news for ya, Larr. Yer still a fatshit.


Who says there's no truth in advertising?

Labels: Advertising, Fitness, Health, Hot Bitches, Rants, TV

Yeah, so I haven't smoked in like a week. Not since Andy Kemp's farewell party. Mostly because I got sick with a cold right after that. I was coughing so hard I couldn't even think about cigarettes. Even when I got better (I'm still not completely well) The desire to smoke wasn't even there.

So I just simply made the decision to quit cold turkey. I know what everyone says, "Oh, it won't work. It'll fail. You can't quit cold turkey." Eat Me. Fuck You I can.

I haven't had a cigarette in a week now. So far, so good. Although it is tough. My body's not craving the smoke, but it is craving the nicotine. My brain is sending me messages while I'm driving like, "Shouldn't you be smoking? You mostly smoke when you drive." But my will to defy and resist even my own urges is strong. I'm having nic fits, but I'm replacing them with drinking water.

I still go out of the office with the smokers when they feel the need. Even though I'm not smoking. I can tolerate being around smoke. Most people it would make them want to smoke more. Not me. It's more of an endurance test. I go out just to get away from my desk for a while. My brain needs the break.

One thing I've noticed since I've stopped is my senses have become more acute. I can smell what my clothes really smelled like when I was smoking. Usually I'm pretty conscious of that. I try to keep the scent off of me to a degree, but sometimes it's pretty obvious. But now I can instantly tell when someone else has recently had a cigarette. I can go "He had one five minutes ago, and she had one ten." My father went through the same thing when he got out of the hospital this past summer. He lost the desire to smoke and when he stopped he realized what his clothes smelled like.

It's funny the lack of nicotine in my system has started to make me act weird(er). I'm walking around more silly and it's probably because I haven't had a smoke to mellow me out in a week.


Well, I don't know. We'll see how it goes. Wish me luck. Next thing you know, I'll be eating right and exercising.

Labels: Fitness, Health

Lifetime TV is launching a new show this season called How To Look Good Naked. A new type of makeover show in the vein of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, hosted by Carson Kressley.

I love the concept of this show. It teaches full-sized women to love their bodies. That they shouldn't have to resort to extreme dieting or cosmetic surgery, trying to look like magazine models. Self-image is one of the biggest psychological issues among full-sized women. No matter how beautiful these women are, they never see themselves as such. As long as they see that they are not a size zero, they won't believe that they are beautiful. It's a crying shame.

Did you know that four out of five American women today say they are are dissatisfied with their bodies?

I hate that fashion industry-driven projection that women should look like toothpicks and Barbie dolls. In fact I hate a bony bitch. Women are subjected to this barrage of imagery that tells them that their bodies aren't good enough. I have news for you, ladies. Even those sacks of anorexia aren't as thin as they appear. Repeat the following words after me, "Airbrush, Photoshop, CGI, Digital Enhancement, Eating Disorder"

Something else I saw to this effect was the release of a photography book by Leonard Nimoy (yes, Mr. Spock) called "The Full Body Project" in which he used very Rubenesque full-figured nude models. The book can be viewed as almost an indictment of Hollywood and the glamour machine that spoon feeds the message that women should be a size zero. I'm very proud of him for doing such bold work.



I'm not a chubby-chaser or anything, but I do appreciate a full-figured woman. I like a woman with a little meat on her bones. Nothing wrong with that. More than that, I like a woman that's got a little size, but is confident with her shit. There's nothing more sexy than confidence. There's nothing less sexy to me than insecurity. I know that's a backwards-ass statement coming from my fat ass, who's very insecure about my weight.

On the other hand, though I'd love nothing more than to drop like a hundy, I also have self-image expectations set in reality. I work with what I've got. Sometimes I don't always dress the best for my body, but I do clean up good. especially lately. I make the sexy work for me.

There's nothing wrong with thinking you're sexy. If you think it, you will project it. If you believe that you are, then you are.


Bottom line, be proud of what you have. If you could lose a few pounds, well ok. Couldn't we all? Just don't let Cosmo tell you what your body should look like.



'How To Look Good Naked' Becomes Most-Watched Reality Series Premiere in Lifetime...
How To Look Good Naked by Leonard Nimoy
The Full Body Project by Leonard Nimoy

Labels: Fitness, Life, Pop Culture, Society, TV

One of the downsides of losing a lot of weight is that your clothes no longer fit. I was wearing a pair of jeans that I bought a year ago yesterday. They were so baggy that as I was leaving O'Grady's, they actually fell down off my ass around my ankles.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I unintentionally dropped trow outside of a family restaurant. There's a nice picture. Hi, little girl. :S

I guess that it's a good thing tha I'm losing weight, but jeez. Keeping up with the wardrobe is a bear. ;) I used to buy clothes a size smaller and put them away in a closet until I could fit them. That actually works for me. It's good motivation to keep losing weight.

What I really need to do is start hitting the gym, now that I am not working. And once I get my new job, continue to hit the gym.

I actually found an old pair of sneakers last month, that were about 5 years old and funky, but the cushioning was still great on them. I could actually run in them and there was like zero shock. I could use these for doing any kind of high impact workout without killing my feet, ankles, or knees.

Labels: Clothes, Fitness